My previous blog, “Meetings,” inspired Dan Waters to write the following. Dan, poet, artist, and musician, is also a trustee of the West Tisbury Free Public Library and very, very involved in its renovation and expansion plans. In other words, he knows whereof he speaks. Dan is the proprietor of Indian Hill Press, which turns out the best notecards on Martha’s Vineyard, written, illustrated, typeset, and printed by Dan. (In this capacity he does not have to attend meetings.) He says that when this list reaches 10, he may print it as a broadside. This would be an instant collector’s item for all the meeting-holics of MV and their long-suffering friends and family members. Why should golf and fishing widow(er)s get all the attention?

You know you’re a Vineyard meeting-holic when:

1. You know all the MVTV camera people on a first-name basis.
2. “Aye” and “Nay” no longer sound like pirate lingo.
3. You can quote Open Meeting Law by heart.
4. You can write minutes in your sleep.
5. The Town Hall staff treats you like you work there.
6. Your group gets asked to make room for another meeting, and you’re supposed to be in THAT meeting too.
7. You know exactly where to find plastic spoons in the Howes House.
8. You can set up a PowerPoint presentation blindfolded.
9. You go to a selectmen’s meeting in another town and it feels like somebody recast your favorite play . . . same roles, different faces.

Extra! Extra! We have a 10!

10.  It feels wrong to sit down to dinner without a quorum present.